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And she's gonna treat him like **** because he's gonna kiss her *** for giving him what he's built-up in his mind as the end-all, be-all of human existance. But inside, there is always the hunger for true companioship between married couples. I hate answering by saying "I'm fine" when really I'm not! honest with myself and allow you to blame me for the failure of our marriage.... This morning as I was drinking my coffee in the kitchen my husband walks by and he asks me where I'd put the suitcase. It's been 19 years, but it's been bad for so long, I don't even know what a healthy relationship is anymore. During this time, I totally devoted my life to being a loyal wife and a good mother. He seems to be okay with everything but I am not and its frustrating. for more, as this life I've become entrapped in feels cold and desolate, so very lonely to me. and playful and I still look at her breasts and *** when she's near me.